


Should we be doing this?

by Despereauxx (orphan_account)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst??, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, My First Work in This Fandom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-27
Updated: 2016-08-27
Packaged: 2018-08-11 09:04:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7884997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Despereauxx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Baekhyun needed someone to hold him, and Jongdae was there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Should we be doing this?

**Author's Note:**

> First fic, and I'm terrified.
> 
> If you don't like my writing or this ship, then do not to read it.  
> For those who do read it, thank you! ( :  
> 

Should we be doing this?

 

****

 

 

Baekhyun traces the muscles of the man lying beside him as his head rests against his shoulder. It’s not the body of a tall lean man, but a much shorter man, almost the same height as him.

 

The other man trails his fingers through Baekhyun’s hair, brushing his bangs away from his eyes.

 

Jongdae’s hand finds Baekhyun’s, and he stops tracing the man’s muscles, stilling his movements.

 

”Baekhyun..? Is this okay?” There’s a long silence in the room, and Baekhyun can hear him thinking. He always does this when he feels confused or guilty.

 

”I mean, should we be doing this?” He’s not looking at him, only staring into the plain wall in front of him.

 

Baekhyun’s glad. Glad that he isn’t looking into those beautiful brown eyes. He would break down in tears if he ever faced him now.

 

What they did last night, the way they had been pressing their lips against each other. It made him feel alive, he had longed for it.

 

He remembered how one of them whispered; _I love you_ , against the other’s lips, but he doesn’t remember who it was. It scared him. It made him feel guilty.

 

He hated this feeling.

 

But he missed someone who would hold him.

 

It had been so long since Chanyeol.

 

Since Xiumin.

 

Since someone had cared for either of them.

 

He wants to say yes.

 

But,

 

He can’t find an answer, it is buried deep down in his body, but he has to search for it. The weight of his decision is weighing down on his chest, making it hard for him to breathe.

 

Jongdae wouldn’t fight him, wouldn’t hate him for his answer, yes **_or_** no. Truth be told, Jongdae had fallen too deeply, to ever hate him.

 

That’s why he always went back to Jongdae, because he understood how the latter worked. Baekhyun would always come crawling back to Jongdae. He would, not only hurt himself, but also Jongdae whenever he did that. But Jongdae would still hold him. Still Love him.

 

Is this okay?

_He remembers how heartbroken Jongdae was when Xiumin left him for Luhan. Xiumin was never good enough for Jongdae anyway, Baekhyun thought._

 

Is this okay?

_He thought he had found his soulmate. Chanyeol was everything that he ever wanted or needed._

 

_But then he left._

 

_And Jongdae was there for him when he left. He had held him through it, whispered soothing words into his ear._

 

Baekhyun pulls himself up and leans over the other male. He looks deep into those brown eyes. They’re clear and sincere just like his own.

 

He needed this. He just needed this little push, and Jongdae was there to catch him.

 

He leans down to capture his lips in his own. The kiss is small and sweet, quite different from those passionate kisses they shared last night.

 

”Yeah, Jongdae. This is okay.”

 


End file.
